A Decade Without Dad

Ten years ago, I lost my dad. It was sudden. One moment we had a tee time, the next we were in an ICU room, saying goodbye. Life cracked open that night in a way I still feel.

In the days and weeks that followed, I leaned on two things to keep me upright. Trying to hold it all together when I just wanted to fall apart. My friends and music are what kept me propped up.

The way my people showed up for me is something I’ll never forget. They were there before I could even ask. That kind of unwavering loyalty leaves a permanent mark.

And then there was the music. Which is what we focus on around here.

At first it was comfort. Distraction. A place to sit with the pain without needing to explain it. His favorite songs. Songs that I’d always turned to when sad.

Over time, certain songs about dads became companions on the long road of grief. They changed with me, offering new meaning at each bend.

John Baumann’s “Old Stone Church” echoed the quiet strength of the man I lost. It distilled the raw emotions I was feeling like nothing ever has. Sadly, it’s because Baumann had a very similar experience in losing his own dad.

Adam Hood’s “He Did” reminded me of the lessons he passed down without ever saying a word. We played this one at the funeral.

Ben Danaher’s “Father’s Blood” made me proud to carry his name. A reminder of legacy and the reason we carry on.

The Reed Brothers’ “Dad” inspired me in the best way. Pride.

And “Steak Night at the Prairie Rose” by Silverada brought moments of nostalgic joy. The old man always liked to find some fun along the way.

Grief never leaves, it just changes shape. And these songs have been like old friends who always know just what to say.

Thanks to the artists who unknowingly helped me through. And to the friends who knowingly did.